Bodega

[an unemployed writer, Josh, walks into his neighborhood bodega and gets a fifth of Seagram's 7 and a liter of 7-up. sidling up behind him is a drunk American asshole from Chicago.]

DRUNK: Canadian whiskey? Why'd you wanna buy Canadian whiskey?

JOSH: Is there a problem with that?

[the drunk considers]

DRUNK: No, no problem. I mean, Irish or Scottish, Kentucky even -

JOSH: I like all those, tonight it appears it's Canadian.

DRUNK: Seems sort of un-patriotic.

JOSH: Tastes good with 7-up.

[the Latin cashier mumbles]

CASHIER: I can't drink the stuff.

[an epiphany]

DRUNK: I know. There's pussy involved. There's got to be pussy involved. You were sent on an errand...

[transaction complete. Josh turns to the drunk.]

JOSH: You're exactly right. Have a good night.

[Josh exits to laughter where he drives to a friends house with his girl for movie night. Upon arriving, he relays his encounter and one friend, a crippled Russian Ph.D student of philosophy, Aleks, inspects the bottle and states.]

ALEKS: Blended and bottled by: The 7 Crown Distilling Company, Norwalk, CT.

JOSH: Not Canadian.

[end]